No one makes it through the adoption wait without a lot of strong distractions. A wise social worker (who’s also an adoptive mom herself) advised me that she made it through with “the right balance of exercise and alcohol”. House projects and vacations are also common suggestions. Anything to keep you from sitting around dwelling on all the factors out of your control. And it doesn’t get better at any point in the process. First you’re wondering why you haven’t been contacted by any expectant women, then you’re worrying about the details of her situation. An idle mind will wander, and for those of us in a precarious point in our lives, that can be a dangerous thing.
If you’re like us and have a long stretch between first contact and birth, you also may find yourself running out of distractions. I’ve fixed up the nursery, re-painted almost our entire apartment, and we’ve taken multiple trips. I’ve cleaned and organized and planned every detail of our travel for the birth. Honestly, there’s not enough workouts and wine in the world to calm the nerves and anxiety I’m feeling now. Deep cleansing breaths have become routine as I struggle to fight the feeling that I’m on an out of control roller coaster that’s about to speed off the tracks. In the midst of it all, my incessant nervous babble about air travel with a car seat is driving my husband crazy.
In an attempt to calm me down (for both of our sakes) he recently suggested that I try knitting. I purchased a set of needles and some yarn, and after googling a few tutorials I’ve started on my first project — the most basic baby blanket. It’ll be small, all one color, very simple stitching, and full of beginner mistakes. But hopefully in a handful of days it will be keeping our baby warm.
Gosh, thinking about that is making me nervous again. If you need me I’ll be playing with yarn.